Secret #1

"Dear God- You're joking, right?"

This conversation was not theological at all. I hate to say it but we were actually talking about ugly babies! My friend said jokingly that if she were to have ugly kids, she would call God and ask, "you're joking, right?"

But this actually got me thinking...haven't you ever had a moment when you look at what's in front of you and ask God if he's playing a joke on you? I know I have. Come on, don't be afraid to admit that you have, too. It seems that it happens when we feel we are stretched to our limits, when we feel like we just can't handle anything else when God says, "HA! And you thought I was finished!"

I have definitely had a few of the moments over the past few months and I have a feeling I may have a few more of them this spring. Whether laughing or crying, all you can really do is just sit back and go along for the ride.


PS!!! I'm planning a reading day in Boston and I'm pretty much excited, even though it's not going to happen for a few months, not until it really warms up. All I want to do is take blanket, a pillow, and a good book. I'll sit in the Boston Commons and just enjoy the day :-)

"God Got Tired"

After the past few days, I've decided that I need to start praying for patience and understanding again. I do my best to always show love to others but I feel that I have failed miserably this week. I have been unusually short with others, jumping to conclusions, and have been more reactive instead of proactive.

"I'm gonna beat the crap outta you because that's the Christian thing to do!"

Clearly not but that doesn't mean that I haven't let my temper get the best of me. I sat up last night writing an email try to get a better understand of things in life; why I have felt so rejected and how I need to handle situations. I love writing and just letting everything spill out. I don't even think about what I'm saying and by the end, I realize that I have nearly perfectly portrayed my feelings. I laid in bed for over an hour trying to fall asleep but it wasn't until I was able to get everything off my chest and out there to someone that was I able to simply relax, close my eyes, and get some rest.

My point is...or am I just rambling again? I'm not perfect. No one is (well, there was this one guy...but we killed him). I make mistakes and I will continue to make mistakes. But I hope with each one I learn a lesson and am able to take that with me into the next day.

Freshman year in college, I received a devotional book from a dear friend. Remember seeing the billboards on the highway, little one-liners, as if they were coming straight from God's mouth? It's a book of billboards and this one seems conducive for me at the moment...


"Don't fear the future. I'm already there. -GOD"
There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. Proverbs 23:18

"It's human nature to fear the future. After all, none of us knows what's around the next bend. Life is a series of hills and valleys, sharp turns and bumpy roads. Sometimes we'll be sailing down an interstate highway, enjoying the scenery, when we hit an unexpected detour that takes us miles away from our destination. What if we make a wrong turn and get lost?
Don't worry. God's already been there before you. He knows where all the ruts and potholes and speed traps are. If you open His map book- the Bible- He'll show you the best route to take to avoid the worst roads.
You can trust God to lead you every step of the way. He knows the beginning and the end, as well as the middle of the journey. He will walk right by your side through every circumstance of life. And He will never leave you. There is nothing to fear when you are walking with Him.
There is one catch. You actually have to listen and let Him teach you. You'll wander around lost if you refuse to read the map or ask for directions. So trust Him to lead you in the right direction. All you have to do is ask!"

There Is No Charge For Awesomeness...Or Attractiveness

So excited to finally watch Kung Fu Panda with my mom...and she fell asleep :-(

Last night in Michigan; kinda happy, kinda sad
Excited to see the family again in four months
Ready to finish grad school
One more JV season with 21 athletes...yeah
Gonna miss my real mattress
I will make it to a Red Sox game and the Ben and Jerry's factory

This winter break went way too fast. I can't believe I have to go back tomorrow, wish I would have taken more advantage of my time here.

Winter Lightning

Speaking of your mother dying...
One, two, three, DOWN!!
Who rolls six 5's at one time!?
Is this how you do it? Koala!!
We're just testing it out!
That is not proper sledding etiquette
Would you like some...soda?
It could be worse


There is a comfort offered with each trip to Bourbonnais that cannot be explained. I love it there and do not think I would complain if I were led back there after graduate school. Only issue...I need a job. My heart is set on getting an assistant coaching position at a university but I'm not sure how others see that happening. Questions have been asked about what else I can do with my degree, other sports I can coach or other jobs I can do at a school but coach on the side. My heart is set on having the title "Assistant Softball Coach". That's it. Nothing else. I understand that I may have to take on a position within the athletic department or do some administrative work but I don't want people to know me as the girl behind the desk. I desire to coach and be known for my knowledge and skills. But...I gotta do what God wants me to do. If that means taking a job that allows me to coach on the side, I'll do it. But I have faith that the coaching position I want is out there and God will take me where I need to be to do His work.

Psalms 37:4
Take delight in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. (NIV)